Men’s Weekend Details

For Real Men with the courage to journey from Sex to Love

]January is dark, but also full – of hidden potential waiting to be unleashed when the sun shines.  In this weekend we will allow space for any darkness (its all pain at the end of the day) that needs to be en-lightened.  The focus of ‘from Sex to Love’ will be on the darkness all men carry about sex, and how to reconcile that with our divine instincts – of course it is all the same life energy with various degrees of refinement .  Boys and men are not just made of ‘snicks and snails and puppy dog tails’ though, we are also noble and have all experienced ourselves as divine lovers at least at one time or another.  We will practice exercises to empower us in literally making love, separating this from ejaculation is just the start.


There will be time to nurture our friendship with the other men, but this is not idle hang out time – clean friendship cleans us, and like all good journeys, we have an intention – of meeting the women (who will have been on their own retreat) on the Sunday afternoon.  The creative tension this brings will fuel our weekend together.

How will you Benefit?

  • Cellular relaxation from being accepted in all you are
  • Being witnessed in your male presence and experiencing the effect of this
  • Confidence from experiencing male friendship
  • Exercises you can use to change your state at any time
  • Seeing and knowing yourself as the divine lover
  • Practices to make love for longer, (and for your woman to want to do so!)
  • Loving yourself

Introduction to Practicals

Food will be a mixture of bring & share, with a payment on booking for a delicious 2 course evening supper.  There will be limited very basic sleeping bag type accommodation and there are local B&B’s for example including a Premier Inn in Stroud with double rooms for £39 for that night – more on this after booking or nearer the time.  There will be some outdoor time.

This group will fill fast so book now
This is a wonderful present for yourself or for your loved one if you are a woman reading this!

You are love… and you are man, with all the instincts for nobility and destruction that entails.  Living it all is choiceless, but easier with understanding and less resistance

Life is truly miraculous, but what does that mean for you? – how does a modern man know and live this miraculous-ness without falling into new-agey cliche?

For any man that is interested in spending time with other men for the purpose of developing supportive friendship within a context of consciousness. Women are naturally good at allowing themselves a network of friends with whom they can share, get reflection and support. Men are less used to this, and much of men’s social contact can often be around alcohol, sport, competition or work.

There is nothing wrong with this, but increasingly, many men realise they are losing out on the support they need to be the man, father, partner, colleague, friend they know in their hearts they are capable of being. It is surprisingly commonly said now, even in mainstream media that ‘man is in crisis’, and surveys show that men are more often than not unhappy with their lives.

Tackling this requires looking underneath the superficial advice found in the media and Internet, to investigate for themselves, with like-minded real people what works. That’s where Secret Garden Men’s work comes in.

For anyone that is remotely interested and has not experienced men’s work before, I highly recommend coming along to an event – those that do so are invariably strengthened and find it has refreshed an ancient part of themselves they did not know was parched. See the ‘Read more’ section for some background.

You are warmly invited to a weekend which will leave you more able than ever to relate in a deeply fulfilling and real way with other men, and also with women.

I’d be happy to talk to any men considering attending if they need to – please write to me c/o Joy if so, and we’ll set up a confidential phone call .

This group will fill fast so book now
This is a wonderful present for yourself or for your loved one if you are a woman reading this!

A Taste of Secret Garden Men’s Work
I’m not ready to start a blog but I’m moved to post here:


A text I sent to the men on an intimacy group I was running with Joy, having had to leave it early:

“Msg for the men – Guys, I feel a lot of the troubles we have can be healed if we can find in ourselves the self trust and self love to let go of ideas about having to be true to ourselves or to get it right our way.  How about softening to just say Yes to the woman.  We are big enough to lose and will find that is a real victory.  The goodies come when we are a humble servant of God not a separate ego.  This is a true warrior path, let’s let ourselves lose.’’
and a later comment follow up by email to a man confused by woman :

“Anything that can be taken away from us by woman is not real or worth having.  This is not permission to be brow beaten or a wimp, but an invitation to feel the pain of being made wrong by the woman we love, and let its effect brew in our hearts.  A good brew takes time, and once done, and over the emotion of the moment, if there is anything real that needs to be said, it will find a way to be said through us, not by our small ‘me too’ self. With love, Tim”


And a response to a man who was finding it hard that his woman seemed to be complaining a lot:

It is womans 2nd nature to complain! What I mean by this is that the wounded feminine energy has little power and complaint can be one way it finds expression. The worldly things in life can be harder for a woman since she is not in nature supposed to be involved in the endless doing of modern life. We as men, though we find it very hard often, TEND to be more OK with doing, building, achieving etc. Of course we do this because it is our 2nd nature, but we also do these things FOR woman, which is why it is so hard to bear when doing for her is met with disappointment or complaining.

The nub of it as I see it I that, despite woman constantly telling us she wants the result of our doing, what she actually wants is our 1st nature, which is male presence – this allows her to fall into her 1st nature, love.

When men complain to themselves or woman that she is not appreciating us for our 2nd nature (doing stuff) we miss the point… 2nd nature results (stuff) are a sop. All she ever really wants is our first nature, just like all we ever really want from woman is HER first nature.

Our complaining about her complaining is a very, very understandable and easy trap, however it belittles us and takes away from our power and response-ability to use it to re-find our 1st nature, our presence.


Food for thought? These circles are about men, men being men in the world, men and soul, men and creativity, men and sex, men and purpose, men relating to women, men and children and so much more. Come along and find out .

What You Say

  • Thanks to Tim for his graceful, quiet presence and the space he created in the men’s group

    Nick Woodward, Bristol

  • So good that you support men in the world. You helped me become the man I am today and can’t thank you enough ... awesome.

    Mark Watkins, New Zealand

  • I feel empowered in a wholly physical way. The energy & sense of well-being I have been able to find since becoming involved with yourself, Joy & many of the individuals through Secret Garden has been a delight. I am enjoying my involvement greatly & am grateful that I have this opportunity.

    Pete Jackson, Bristol

  • Thanks Tim for being you, I can honestly say, despite our fears, you pulled it off. You brought the man and child out in me. It was a pure joy to be both and not to worry about be judged or critisized. You are a very bright star in the sky of humanity.
    Scott, thanks for the pictures, they gave me goose bumps.

    Ian Simmonds isle of wight

  • I would like to say I have been deeply moved by the four days. Since the module ended I have spent a lot of time listening to my heart and as soon as I feel hurt I say to myself 'let go of the fight, surrender, stop fighting, love the pain'. I've had 15 years of working with my Kundalini and I now realise I've been very male about it and forgotten the female.
    Thank you too to Tim who's contribution I greatly appreciated, I feel as a man he brought a lot to the group and I'm grateful to him

    David, Stroud

  • Thanks so much for your presence, patience and understanding. Your message of surrender also helped, as did many circle members.
    We are at last getting our connection back. Lots of Love,

    Tom Lowery, Stroud

  • say how much I appreciated your care and guideship of the men last weekend