Why is this relationship hurting when I thought it would heal me?

To make love with a man or a woman is…..strong stuff. A very very strong bond is made whether it is known consciously or not. And that bond will create opportunities for healing, relaxation and nourishment and deep energetic connection which will lead to creative soul growth for both too. So human beings are drawn to the pleasure they know they can find together. They hope that this time, yes this time! they will love joyfully.

At the same time, once this bond is created, it is highly likely that old, unresolved pain if it is there, will surface. Without awareness this can be projected onto the object of affection big time! The pain can go as far back as childhood when -to simplify- the little boy for example felt controlled, guilty or unloved by his mother or the little girl for example felt powerless, unheard or unloved in the presence of her father. And it becomes more complicated because as adults you will attract your energetic match. You will attract a mirror of your unresolved feelings, limiting beliefs, parental complexes. Or a mirror of your clarity and presence and love. Or a mixture.

If your intimate relationship is one where you are on a  soul level meeting with pain that holds you back from freedom, joy, love and openness (all the gifts of just being with another, in ease) – such as jealousy, resentment, competitiveness, manipulation – then a great deal of patience, humility and often outside support and reflection can be needed -because your partner will be doing the exact same thing! And sorting out who is doing what to whom takes care and commitment, and clear communication, especially if you are hurting.

In the ongoing Joyful Loving work and in the Joyful Loving weekends -find out more by starting at http://www.secretgarden.eu.com/joyfulloving.html and dates are at at Upcoming Events – you are invited to meet your mirrors in an energetic field which is light filled. Insights come rapidly, communication becomes clearer and more precise, projections are reclaimed, the depths of archetypal energies are embraced, keys to intimacy are realised, new ways of touching another to enhance sensual pleasure and heal deeper wounds, are learned.

This is fertile ground to see that it is not someone else’s job to make you feel good, that it is impossible to control or change anyone else and that if you do it only sets up resistance. A client shared with me recently what a  relief it was to stop manipulating others so he could feel good, and to realise life’s sweetness is there all along. This life transforming shift came from his first weekend event.

Ultimately your sexual relationships, marriages, friendships are an invitation to see all unfolding as energetic, sensational life, simply being. The man-woman dance of love, polarities, attraction and soul marriage is the most powerful opportunity to dissolve limits to this profound realisation of boundless freedom.

Please feel free to respond with your comments. I read them all and will respond to your questions – just see the box below

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *